what to do while we wait

the waiting was hard. harder than i thought it would be. i remember christie telling me during one of our interviews that she thought it would be hard for me, and i remember telling jon that i thought i'd be fine. oh, ugly pride.

so it was hard. it's hard to plan much when you don't know when you might get a baby. with international adoption, you have some framework of a timeline. it is broad and changing, but there is some framework. with domestic adoption, we had none. they told us that we could get a call and have 24 hours to come and get our child. or we might have a few months if the birth mother wanted to meet us beforehand. covenant care was going to do everything in their power to protect our family. so they didn't want to bring us into the process until they were pretty certain that the birth mother wasn't going to change her mind. and if that certainty wasn't there, then they would wait the 10 days after she had signed away her rights, and then they would tell us.

how do you plan a vacation? when do you start to decorate? to pull old clothes out of the attic? and what do you gear up for? a baby? a toddler? how do you prepare your children for a possibility when you don't know when or where it is coming? do you commit to lead a Bible study when you know that you might have a newborn at any point in time? good grief!!

we eventually figured out that we needed to just live life. when we found out, we could adjust accordingly. by the time we figured that out, we got the call.